I am now in the hospital awaiting triple bypass surgery and am excited for the next chapter of life. The following is a message to all who will hear.

Jesus spoke to me last night and told me to accept this as the healing I have been asking for, for this truly is a miracle.  Not in the way I wanted, but clearly in the way that I would accept.

I’ve been asking for help to open my heart.  Well, I’m having open heart surgery. I’ve been asking for help to heal my heart.  My beliefs were such that I wouldn’t allow direct healing for I didn’t realize the depth of the dis-ease within my heart.  

As such, He brought me back to Alberta 3 years ago to where there is the best heart hospital in Canada.  He lined up the best doctors and is bringing out their Christed selves as they perform the surgery with ease.  I will have significant scarring, which I will wear proudly, as it is signifying God’s graciousness in returning me from the abyss I was in.  I have been declaring that I want to live.  God is giving me the gift of life, born again as the Son of God that I am.  

This event has seen many blessings in it.  I have wanted to heal my relationship with Shelly, my wife.  That is happening as it is a chance to start again and truly live the life we were meant to live together but had too many unhealed issues from the past to do so.

I’ve wanted to rest from the lonely journey I’ve walked so far.  I am getting to do that now.  I no longer have a choice.  I’ve wanted to heal my addictions and that is happening.  I’ve wanted to start exercising and strengthen my body.  I will get to focus on that through my rehabilitation.  I’ve wanted to eat healthier, which includes taking the time to learn new healthy recipes to prepare.   I will get that through the rehab program as well.

I’ve wanted to slow down my pace and learn to enjoy the simpler things that life has to offer.  I am getting that opportunity as well since there will be a minimum of 3 months rehab.  I’ve wanted to take the time to truly enjoy life and I can see that that is what is in front of me.  I’ve wanted to have loving, healthy relationships and I am being washed with love from so many – and finally, somehow through the grace of God, I am starting to be able to receive it.

It’s a whole new beginning that I am truly looking forward to.  It’s a chance to overcome the fears I developed as a child and live a life of love that God had planned for me when He created me.  I am at peace with where I am at and am truly grateful.

The best part of all of this is the number of people who have come forward to show their love, support and caring.  It is something that I am not used to since I learned that I was unworthy of love.  How wrong I was.

I am so blessed and extremely grateful for each and every one of you.  thank you all so much.  I am truly blessed by each of you and return the blessings tenfold.  Thank you Jesus.